Generic Thriller

Cinequest 2009

Generic Thriller:   I can’t say that I wasted 90 minutes of my life at the theater this evening, because I did get some good nap time in. But I can’t say that you should go see this film either. At all. Ever. The misleading title probably didn’t help expectations, but not even in the Cinequest film description are you told that the entire film is constantly narrated by strangely boring Steven and takes place solely on the stage of the SJSU theatre. There is no “thriller”, generic or otherwise. There is a strange killer of blondes that runs around pretending to stab and shoot people, but it’s really only funny for a couple minutes – and don’t even let that bit get you excited, it was NOT exciting. This was not even a poorly thought out SNL skit that was lengthened to a full length feature – it was a long, rambling stream-of-consciousness with no thought provoking ideas or comedic moments, and most especially, it had no Thriller.

It did have one redeeming quality – the awesome Shirley Jones. Head floating around the stage in a bubble, she gives constant advice to Steven as he continues talking and arguing with his players. But don’t think for a moment that any of these supposed conflicts make this film even remotely interesting. I came home and told my son to take it off his movie schedule immediately. No point missing something really great, or even something good, by wasting your Sunday morning watching this.

If for some bizarre reason you’d like to see for yourself, you can watch it on Netflix, DVD or Instant Video.  But just… don’t.